Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Be Your Own Editor 11

Question: How would you revise and edit the following ten-minute essay?

Answer: My suggested revisions will appear in tomorrow's blog.

..........Growing up, children are often asked "What do you want to be when you grow up?" From an early age, teachers parents, coaches try to guide children on the "right" path to success, to look to the future.
...........Fireman, police, nurses, pilots and teachers are a few of the responses one can expect to hear. Somewhere along the way of success comes deterants. Whether it be drugs, cars, quick money, or just status among friends, pressure is all around

All the best. RayS.

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