What is the purpose of writing ten-minute essays? The purpose of your writing 10-minute essays 5 days a week for 3 weeks is to let me, RayS., help you identify the problems in sentence structure, usage, punctuation and style in your own writing. Exercises and examples help you to recognize problems but they seldom transfer to your own writing.
Question: Could you give some examples of what you mean by ten-minute essays?
Answer: For the next several weeks, I will give you some examples of ten-minute essays that I have corrected in the past. Try correcting them yourself and then read my corrections. At any time, feel free to write your own 10-minute essay and send to RayS. at email@example.com.
The words in bold face indicate some of the changes that I will make in the original and have made in my suggested revisions.
Overview of changes: Good 10-minute essay. My changes were few, but important. I thought replacing “there” and “it” made a significant difference in word choice. Note that I combined sentences #1 and #2 in the first paragraph.
Original: The Bus Stop
..........Today, I took my youngest daughter to the bus stop. She is in the second grade and I have been walking her to this stop since last year. The bus stop is just about a half-a-block from our house, but because there are no sidewalks I feel better taking her myself. At 8:20 in the morning the street is bustling with traffic because it is a short-cut to a main artery. (I can't wait for the Blue route to open).
….......During our walk today I sensed that she did not want me to be walking with her. I usually do not wait for the bus to come anymore I just cross-her-over and we kiss goodby. But today when we kissed she seemed to look around to see who was watching, and it was just a peck on the cheek. When I was walking back up the street I felt that maybe the time has come to let her walk down by herself but am I ready.
Suggested Revisions: The Bus Stop
..........Today, I took my youngest daughter, who is in the second grade, to the bus stop as I have done since last year. The bus stop is just about a half-block from our house, but, because the street has no sidewalks and is a short-cut to a main highway, I feel better taking her myself. (I cannot wait for the Blue Route to open.)
..........During our walk today, I sensed that she did not want me walking with her. I usually do not wait for the bus to come. I just cross-her-over and we kiss goodbye. However, today when we kissed, she seemed to look around to see who was watching, and she gave me just a peck on the cheek.
..........Walking back up the street, I felt that maybe the time has come to let her walk to the bus stop by herself. But am I ready?
Note: Again, although I am not able to use redlining in this blog, remember that I will use it with word processing to help you track my revisions. If you have any questions about the changes I have made, please be sure to ask me for explanation.
All the best. RayS.