My method for demonstrating these predictable sentence problems is to use simplified sentences that illustrate the problem and solution clearly and to conclude with some long sentences in which the problem is almost hidden. Additional practice and explanation can be found on the Internet which lists hundreds of thousands of Web sites dealing with the topic.
Question: How can I identify dangling modifiers and what do I do about them?
Answer: Dangling modifier simplified sentence: “Carrying a hot dog and a coke, the Phillies hit into a double play.” Some dangling modifiers are downright funny.
Solution: Who is carrying the hot dog and coke? Not the Phillies. They’re busy hitting into a double play. Make clear who is doing the action in the dangling modifier: “While I was carrying a hot dog and a coke, the Phillies hit into a double play.”
Easy, huh? Solving dangling modifiers becomes difficult in longer sentences. Following is an example of a dangling modifier that I took from a column written by a local columnist, who should have known better:
Dangling modifier: “Seven years ago, stuck in a mid-life crisis, a therapist suggested I try envisioning my life five or ten years down the road.”
Solution: Was the therapist stuck in a mid-life crisis? The way the sentence is structured, the reader would think so. Of course not. The writer was the one stuck in the mid-life crisis. “Seven years ago, when I was stuck in a mid-life crisis, a therapist suggested I try envisioning my life five or ten years down the road.”
Be sure to make clear who is doing the action in the dangling modifier.
Below are two long dangling modifiers from Warriner’s English Grammar and Composition, 1986. As you will note, the dangling modifiers are not so easy to recognize or to correct in longer sentences. Brendan Gill in Here at the New Yorker tells how he and his editor spent the better part of a day arguing about the supposed existence of a dangling modifier in one of his articles as he was preparing to go to print.
Dangling modifier: “Representing the conservative point of view, the liberals rebutted her arguments.” p. 305. Okay, the reader can figure out what is meant. But the reader has to take the time to figure it out and in the time that it takes to do so becomes distracted from following the writer’s ideas.
Solution: Who is representing the conservative point of view? Certainly not the liberals. “Because she represented the conservative point of view, the liberals rebutted her arguments.”
Be sure to make clear who is doing the action in the dangling modifier.
Dangling Modifier: “While playing in the high chair, I was afraid the baby would fall out.” p. 307.
Solution: Who is playing in the high chair? Certainly I am not. The baby is. “When the baby was playing in the high chair, I was afraid she would fall out.”
Need more practice with dangling modifiers? Type “dangling modifier” into the Google search engine and you will find 210,000 Web sites, many of them with more explanation and plenty of exercises.
Note: several people have pointed out to me that doing exercises helps them understand the concept, but they have difficulty finding these problems in their own writing. When I have completed this series on predictable problems in sentence structure, I will suggest a method to help you learn to recognize these problems in your own writing.
All the best. RayS.
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
Monday, July 30, 2007
Predictable Problems in Sentence Structure 04: Active and Passive Voice
Active/Passive Voice
My method for demonstrating these predictable sentence problems is to use simplified sentences that illustrate the problem and solution clearly and to conclude with some long sentences in which the problem is almost hidden. Additional practice and explanation can be found on the Internet which lists hundreds of thousands of Web sites dealing with the topic.
Question: I’ve been told to use the active voice as often as possible. What is it and why?
Answer: Active voice simplified sentence: “The boy hit the ball.” Passive voice simplified sentence: “The ball was hit by the boy.” In the active voice, the subject, or “boy,” is doing the action: he is hitting the ball. In the passive, the subject, “ball” is receiving the action from the boy.
True, having the subject do the action is more direct and clear in meaning. The passive, as the word implies, is an indirect statement, slows the action and often hides who is responsible for the action. For example: “Mr. Jordan has ordered drug tests for everyone.” Mr. Jordan, in the active voice, is the subject of the sentence and is taking responsibility for ordering the drug tests. The passive, “It has been decided that all employees will have drug tests” hides the subject, the person responsible for the drug tests. The passive is often used to hide responsibility.
Below are some longer examples of passive sentences transformed into active sentences, from Warriner’s English Grammar and Composition, 1986.
Passive: “After the computers had been installed by the service reps, a training session was held for us by them.”
Active: “After the service reps installed the computers, they held a training session for us.”
Passive: “A community meeting was held by the area homeowners to discuss the landfill project, which had been proposed by the City Council.”
Active: “Area home owners held a community meeting to discuss the City Council’s proposed landfill project.”
On the Internet: To practice turning passive sentences into active sentences, type “passive active voice” into the Google search engine. You will find 1,900,000 Web sites containing more discussion of the issues involving active and passive voice and plenty of exercises.
All the best. RayS.
My method for demonstrating these predictable sentence problems is to use simplified sentences that illustrate the problem and solution clearly and to conclude with some long sentences in which the problem is almost hidden. Additional practice and explanation can be found on the Internet which lists hundreds of thousands of Web sites dealing with the topic.
Question: I’ve been told to use the active voice as often as possible. What is it and why?
Answer: Active voice simplified sentence: “The boy hit the ball.” Passive voice simplified sentence: “The ball was hit by the boy.” In the active voice, the subject, or “boy,” is doing the action: he is hitting the ball. In the passive, the subject, “ball” is receiving the action from the boy.
True, having the subject do the action is more direct and clear in meaning. The passive, as the word implies, is an indirect statement, slows the action and often hides who is responsible for the action. For example: “Mr. Jordan has ordered drug tests for everyone.” Mr. Jordan, in the active voice, is the subject of the sentence and is taking responsibility for ordering the drug tests. The passive, “It has been decided that all employees will have drug tests” hides the subject, the person responsible for the drug tests. The passive is often used to hide responsibility.
Below are some longer examples of passive sentences transformed into active sentences, from Warriner’s English Grammar and Composition, 1986.
Passive: “After the computers had been installed by the service reps, a training session was held for us by them.”
Active: “After the service reps installed the computers, they held a training session for us.”
Passive: “A community meeting was held by the area homeowners to discuss the landfill project, which had been proposed by the City Council.”
Active: “Area home owners held a community meeting to discuss the City Council’s proposed landfill project.”
On the Internet: To practice turning passive sentences into active sentences, type “passive active voice” into the Google search engine. You will find 1,900,000 Web sites containing more discussion of the issues involving active and passive voice and plenty of exercises.
All the best. RayS.
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Predictable Problems in Sentence Structure 03: Sentence Fragments.
My method for demonstrating these predictable sentence problems is to use simplified sentences that illustrate the problem and solution clearly and to conclude with some long sentences in which the problem is almost hidden.
Question: What are some problems that you can predict will appear in students’ writing?
Answer: sentence fragments are incomplete sentences. Examples: “The roof in the yard.” “Riding her new bicycle.” “After the rain stopped.”
Solution: Add a subject or verb. Add to an already existing complete sentence, either preceding or following the fragment.
Simplified sentence: The Phillies played. After the rain stopped.
Correction: The Phillies played after the rain stopped. (Added to the preceding complete thought.)
Simplified sentence. After the hurricane. The roof in the yard.
Correction: “After the hurricane, the roof lay in the yard.” (Added verb--"lay"--to the subject "roof.")
Simplified sentence: She was on the sidewalk. Riding her new bike.
Correction: “She was on the sidewalk riding her new bike.” (Added to the preceding complete thought.)
Once again, the problem with most sentence fragments is in longer sentences where the fragment is almost hidden.
Here are two long sentences containing fragments from Warriner’s English Grammar and Composition, 1986.
Fragment: “Elizabeth established a school for girls. Feeling depressed by the economic plight of her family, which now consisted of her mother, four sisters and four brothers.” p. 274.
Corrected: Feeling depressed by the economic plight of her family, which now consisted of her mother, four sisters and four brothers, Elizabeth established a school for girls. (Placed fragment after the preceding complete sentence, "Elizabeth established a school for girls.")
Corrected: Elizabeth established a school for girls because she was feeling depressed by the economic plight of her family, which now consisted of her mother, four sisters and four brothers.” (Added subject and verb.)
Fragment: “When told that it would be impossible for a woman to become a doctor, she determined to follow her dying friend’s advice. Not certain how she should proceed against the forces of prejudice.” p. 274.
Corrected: “When told that it would be impossible for a woman to become a doctor, she determined to follow her dying friend’s advice, although she was not certain how she should proceed against the forces of prejudice.” (Added subject and verb.)
And don’t forget that many an author uses sentence fragments on purpose to vary style. If you commit sentence fragments NOT on purpose and want to practice correcting sentence fragments, put the topic, “sentence fragments,” in Google and you will find 1,700,000 Web sites, most of them with exercises and explanations.
All the best. RayS.
Question: What are some problems that you can predict will appear in students’ writing?
Answer: sentence fragments are incomplete sentences. Examples: “The roof in the yard.” “Riding her new bicycle.” “After the rain stopped.”
Solution: Add a subject or verb. Add to an already existing complete sentence, either preceding or following the fragment.
Simplified sentence: The Phillies played. After the rain stopped.
Correction: The Phillies played after the rain stopped. (Added to the preceding complete thought.)
Simplified sentence. After the hurricane. The roof in the yard.
Correction: “After the hurricane, the roof lay in the yard.” (Added verb--"lay"--to the subject "roof.")
Simplified sentence: She was on the sidewalk. Riding her new bike.
Correction: “She was on the sidewalk riding her new bike.” (Added to the preceding complete thought.)
Once again, the problem with most sentence fragments is in longer sentences where the fragment is almost hidden.
Here are two long sentences containing fragments from Warriner’s English Grammar and Composition, 1986.
Fragment: “Elizabeth established a school for girls. Feeling depressed by the economic plight of her family, which now consisted of her mother, four sisters and four brothers.” p. 274.
Corrected: Feeling depressed by the economic plight of her family, which now consisted of her mother, four sisters and four brothers, Elizabeth established a school for girls. (Placed fragment after the preceding complete sentence, "Elizabeth established a school for girls.")
Corrected: Elizabeth established a school for girls because she was feeling depressed by the economic plight of her family, which now consisted of her mother, four sisters and four brothers.” (Added subject and verb.)
Fragment: “When told that it would be impossible for a woman to become a doctor, she determined to follow her dying friend’s advice. Not certain how she should proceed against the forces of prejudice.” p. 274.
Corrected: “When told that it would be impossible for a woman to become a doctor, she determined to follow her dying friend’s advice, although she was not certain how she should proceed against the forces of prejudice.” (Added subject and verb.)
And don’t forget that many an author uses sentence fragments on purpose to vary style. If you commit sentence fragments NOT on purpose and want to practice correcting sentence fragments, put the topic, “sentence fragments,” in Google and you will find 1,700,000 Web sites, most of them with exercises and explanations.
All the best. RayS.
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Predictable Problems in Sentence structure 02: run-on sentences
Question: What are some problems in sentence structure that you can predict will appear in students’ writing?
Answer: the run-on sentence (also called a “comma splice”) in which two complete sentences are connected inadequately by a comma.
Solutions: period; semicolon; coordinate conjunction; subordinate conjunction.
Simplified sentence: “I saw the Phillies play, they lost as usual.” (Run-on sentence or comma splice.)
Corrected: “I saw the Phillies play. They lost as usual.” (Period.)
Corrected: “I saw the Phillies play; they lost as usual.” (Semicolon.)
Corrected: “I saw the Phillies play and they lost as usual.” (Coordinate conjunction.)
Corrected: “When I saw the Phillies play, they lost as usual.” (Subordinate conjunction)
Note: Coordinate conjunctions: “and,” “but,” “or,” “nor,” “for,” “yet,” “so.”
Subordinate conjunctions: “when…,” “after…,” “because…,” “since…,” etc.
Important variation: the use of "however," "nevertheless," etc. is one of the most frequent run-ons. “I saw the Phillies play, however, they lost as usual.” (Run-on, comma splice.)
Corrected: “I saw the Phillies play; however, they lost as usual.”
(; however,)
Simplified sentences clearly demonstrate the problem of and the solutions to run-on sentences. However, the problem will not be as obvious when older students and adults are using long sentences. Here are some longer run-on, comma splice sentences from Warriner’s English Grammar and Composition, 1986:
Run-on: “Ynes Mexia, the botanical explorer, discovered rare tropical plants on her expeditions to Mexico and South America, these discoveries were of great value to science.” p. 277.
Corrected: “Ynes Mexia, the botanical explorer, discovered rare tropical plants on her expeditions to Mexico and South America. These discoveries were of great value to science.” (period)
Run-on: “The astounding scientific developments of one generation are accepted commonplaces in the next generation, the computer and the cassette recorder, for instance, are taken for granted by everyone today.” p. 278.
Corrected: “The astounding scientific developments of one generation are accepted commonplaces in the next generation; the computer and the cassette recorder, for instance, are taken for granted by everyone today.”(semicolon)
If run-on sentences are among your habitual problems, type "run-on sentences" in Google. and click "Go." The last time I checked, Google had 1,720,000 Web sites dealing with run-on sentences, many of them exercises, with some interesting presentations explaining the problem.
All the best. RayS.
Answer: the run-on sentence (also called a “comma splice”) in which two complete sentences are connected inadequately by a comma.
Solutions: period; semicolon; coordinate conjunction; subordinate conjunction.
Simplified sentence: “I saw the Phillies play, they lost as usual.” (Run-on sentence or comma splice.)
Corrected: “I saw the Phillies play. They lost as usual.” (Period.)
Corrected: “I saw the Phillies play; they lost as usual.” (Semicolon.)
Corrected: “I saw the Phillies play and they lost as usual.” (Coordinate conjunction.)
Corrected: “When I saw the Phillies play, they lost as usual.” (Subordinate conjunction)
Note: Coordinate conjunctions: “and,” “but,” “or,” “nor,” “for,” “yet,” “so.”
Subordinate conjunctions: “when…,” “after…,” “because…,” “since…,” etc.
Important variation: the use of "however," "nevertheless," etc. is one of the most frequent run-ons. “I saw the Phillies play, however, they lost as usual.” (Run-on, comma splice.)
Corrected: “I saw the Phillies play; however, they lost as usual.”
(; however,)
Simplified sentences clearly demonstrate the problem of and the solutions to run-on sentences. However, the problem will not be as obvious when older students and adults are using long sentences. Here are some longer run-on, comma splice sentences from Warriner’s English Grammar and Composition, 1986:
Run-on: “Ynes Mexia, the botanical explorer, discovered rare tropical plants on her expeditions to Mexico and South America, these discoveries were of great value to science.” p. 277.
Corrected: “Ynes Mexia, the botanical explorer, discovered rare tropical plants on her expeditions to Mexico and South America. These discoveries were of great value to science.” (period)
Run-on: “The astounding scientific developments of one generation are accepted commonplaces in the next generation, the computer and the cassette recorder, for instance, are taken for granted by everyone today.” p. 278.
Corrected: “The astounding scientific developments of one generation are accepted commonplaces in the next generation; the computer and the cassette recorder, for instance, are taken for granted by everyone today.”(semicolon)
If run-on sentences are among your habitual problems, type "run-on sentences" in Google. and click "Go." The last time I checked, Google had 1,720,000 Web sites dealing with run-on sentences, many of them exercises, with some interesting presentations explaining the problem.
All the best. RayS.
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Predictable Problems in Sentence Structure 01
Question: What are some problems in sentence structure that you can predict will appear in students’ writing?
Answer: run-on sentences; sentence fragments; active/passive voice; dangling modifiers; misplaced modifiers; parallel structure.
My purposes in the next few sessions will be to explain clearly the nature of these problems. I will use simplified sentences that will make clear each problem and its solution. I will not attempt exhaustive coverage of each problem because the Internet can provide an incredible number of Web sites dealing with these problems.
For example:
Run-on sentences: 1,720,000 Web sites, many of which consist of exercises and additional explanation.
Sentence fragments: 1,700,000 Web sites
Active and passive voice: 1,940,000 Web sites
Dangling modifiers: 210,000 Web sites
Misplaced modifiers: 193,000 Web sites
Parallel structure: 57,200,000 Web sites
Although the simplified sentences will make clear the problem and solutions, the real problem will be with the longer sentences used by older students and adults. Longer sentences “hide” the problems. I will conclude each section with some long sentences taken from Warriner’s English Grammar and Composition, Liberty Edition by John E. Warriner. Complete Course. New York, etc.: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, Publishers. 1986.
Here are some examples of each problem:
Run-on sentences: I saw the Phillies play, they lost as usual.
Sentence fragment: The Phillies played. After the rain.
Dangling modifier: Carrying a hot dog and a coke, the Phillies hit into a double play.
Misplaced modifier: I walked my dog Guinness carrying a basketball.
Parallel structure: I like to hunt and fishing.
All the best. RayS.
Answer: run-on sentences; sentence fragments; active/passive voice; dangling modifiers; misplaced modifiers; parallel structure.
My purposes in the next few sessions will be to explain clearly the nature of these problems. I will use simplified sentences that will make clear each problem and its solution. I will not attempt exhaustive coverage of each problem because the Internet can provide an incredible number of Web sites dealing with these problems.
For example:
Run-on sentences: 1,720,000 Web sites, many of which consist of exercises and additional explanation.
Sentence fragments: 1,700,000 Web sites
Active and passive voice: 1,940,000 Web sites
Dangling modifiers: 210,000 Web sites
Misplaced modifiers: 193,000 Web sites
Parallel structure: 57,200,000 Web sites
Although the simplified sentences will make clear the problem and solutions, the real problem will be with the longer sentences used by older students and adults. Longer sentences “hide” the problems. I will conclude each section with some long sentences taken from Warriner’s English Grammar and Composition, Liberty Edition by John E. Warriner. Complete Course. New York, etc.: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, Publishers. 1986.
Here are some examples of each problem:
Run-on sentences: I saw the Phillies play, they lost as usual.
Sentence fragment: The Phillies played. After the rain.
Dangling modifier: Carrying a hot dog and a coke, the Phillies hit into a double play.
Misplaced modifier: I walked my dog Guinness carrying a basketball.
Parallel structure: I like to hunt and fishing.
All the best. RayS.
Saturday, July 21, 2007
"Yo."
Question: Is "yo" a verb for what you do with a yo-yo?
Answer: Why not?
Background: "At our church in the summer time, our pastors ask a child to put an object into a special bag and then the pastor makes up an on-the-spot 2-minute children's sermon based on the object. The only requirements is that the object is not alive or has never been alive.
"Last night a child had put a yo-yo in the bag. The pastor took it from the bag and while she was thinking what to say, she asked, 'What do you do with a yo-yo?'
"A little boy put up his hand and answered, 'You yo.' "
Is "yo" a verb?
RayS.: "Yo" is a "Philadelphianism," if there is such a word to describe the language of Philadelphians, that means, "Hi" or "Hello." My daughter Susie always used to greet callers on the phone with "Yo!" Folklore says that it originated in South Philadelphia. Some New Jerseyans say that "Yo!" originated with them. However, I have never heard of "yo" as a verb meaning to use a yo-yo. Frankly, I think "yo" as a verb for what you do with a yo-yo is terrific. The kid is a linguistic genius.
All the best. RayS.
Answer: Why not?
Background: "At our church in the summer time, our pastors ask a child to put an object into a special bag and then the pastor makes up an on-the-spot 2-minute children's sermon based on the object. The only requirements is that the object is not alive or has never been alive.
"Last night a child had put a yo-yo in the bag. The pastor took it from the bag and while she was thinking what to say, she asked, 'What do you do with a yo-yo?'
"A little boy put up his hand and answered, 'You yo.' "
Is "yo" a verb?
RayS.: "Yo" is a "Philadelphianism," if there is such a word to describe the language of Philadelphians, that means, "Hi" or "Hello." My daughter Susie always used to greet callers on the phone with "Yo!" Folklore says that it originated in South Philadelphia. Some New Jerseyans say that "Yo!" originated with them. However, I have never heard of "yo" as a verb meaning to use a yo-yo. Frankly, I think "yo" as a verb for what you do with a yo-yo is terrific. The kid is a linguistic genius.
All the best. RayS.
Friday, July 20, 2007
Informal and Formal Writing 05
Question: What are the differences between informal and formal expression?
Answer: Informal writing is conversational writing, characterized by needless repetition, contractions, general words, lack of clear reference and the “I” and/or “you” point of view.
Today: The problem with demonstrative pronouns—“this,” “that,” “these,” “those” without clear reference.
The demonstrative pronouns, “this,” “that,” “these,” and “those” create problems in coherence when what they refer to is not clear. Usually demonstrative pronouns are found in the expressions “This is….” “That is….” “These are….” and “Those were….”
Antecedent not clear: “He had been playing ball for ten years. This has helped him learn the strategy of the game.
Clear antecedent: “He had been playing ball for ten years. This experience has helped him learn the strategy of the game.”
Without the word “experience,” at the very least, the reader has to fill in the obvious, that it was his "playing ball for ten years" that helped him learn the strategy of the game. As brief a time as it takes to make that connection, the reader is still interrupted and distracted in order to do so. Whenever possible, try not to let “this,” “that,” “these” and “those” as demonstrative pronouns dangle unattached in your sentences. What is the antecedent? Or, to what do “this,” “that,” “these” and “those” refer? Repeating the antecedent or using a synonym after the “dangling” demonstrative pronoun will make your sentences flow smoothly.
Note: What about “...that it was his experience that helped…” in the first sentence of your previous paragraph? The use of “that” in these examples is not as a demonstrative pronoun, but as a relative pronoun, or as a conjunction before subordinate clauses. (A clause has a subject and verb, "...that it was..." and "...that helped...." I’m afraid I’m going to have to resort to teaching some grammar.)
To sum up:
What is the point of this discussion of formal and informal writing? Certain situations require formal writing: writing assignments and research papers in school; formal reports in business situations; articles in professional journals, etc. Informal writing is reader-friendly, inviting the reader to join you in your writing. For example, I have now switched to informal expression. I want to talk directly to and engage my reader.
Keep in mind, too, that most published writing is a mixture of the two styles.
Which to use? The situation will dictate that requirement. Your boss will dictate that requirement. I have tried to show you in the last five blogs how to change your informal expression to formal expression, if you need to, by removing contractions, general words without clear reference and needless repetition and by changing the “I” and/or “you” points of view to third person.
To you as a reader, the conversational tone is engaging. Informal expression has considerable value to you as a writer. When you are not sure what you want to say, you can begin writing by using informal expression. Begin as if you are writing a letter, for example. However, if formal expression is required, then you will need to remove the contractions, general words, and needless repetition and then change the point of view to the third.
Beyond the conventional requirement of formal English in certain situations, why is formal expression desirable? As I read e-mails, I am quick to note people who are careful writers. They always strike me as people who have learned to write. The most significant characteristic is that they do not repeat words unnecessarily, one of the most frequent problems with inexperienced writers who tend to write as they speak.
The value of formal, precise, clear expression is perhaps best summed up in the following quotes from experts on writing:
Zinsser says that good writing “…has an aliveness that keeps the reader reading from one paragraph to the next” (On Writing Well).
Herbert Spencer defined writing style as “that which requires the least effort of understanding” (Durant, The Story of Philosophy, “Herbert Spencer”).
James Thurber described his purpose for rewriting as “…a constant attempt on my part to make the finished version smooth, to make it seem effortless” (Cowley, ed. Writers at Work).
Formal expression accomplishes those goals. Formal expression communicates precisely and clearly, keeps the reader reading with the least effort of understanding and makes the finished piece of writing seem effortless.
All the best. RayS.
Answer: Informal writing is conversational writing, characterized by needless repetition, contractions, general words, lack of clear reference and the “I” and/or “you” point of view.
Today: The problem with demonstrative pronouns—“this,” “that,” “these,” “those” without clear reference.
The demonstrative pronouns, “this,” “that,” “these,” and “those” create problems in coherence when what they refer to is not clear. Usually demonstrative pronouns are found in the expressions “This is….” “That is….” “These are….” and “Those were….”
Antecedent not clear: “He had been playing ball for ten years. This has helped him learn the strategy of the game.
Clear antecedent: “He had been playing ball for ten years. This experience has helped him learn the strategy of the game.”
Without the word “experience,” at the very least, the reader has to fill in the obvious, that it was his "playing ball for ten years" that helped him learn the strategy of the game. As brief a time as it takes to make that connection, the reader is still interrupted and distracted in order to do so. Whenever possible, try not to let “this,” “that,” “these” and “those” as demonstrative pronouns dangle unattached in your sentences. What is the antecedent? Or, to what do “this,” “that,” “these” and “those” refer? Repeating the antecedent or using a synonym after the “dangling” demonstrative pronoun will make your sentences flow smoothly.
Note: What about “...that it was his experience that helped…” in the first sentence of your previous paragraph? The use of “that” in these examples is not as a demonstrative pronoun, but as a relative pronoun, or as a conjunction before subordinate clauses. (A clause has a subject and verb, "...that it was..." and "...that helped...." I’m afraid I’m going to have to resort to teaching some grammar.)
To sum up:
What is the point of this discussion of formal and informal writing? Certain situations require formal writing: writing assignments and research papers in school; formal reports in business situations; articles in professional journals, etc. Informal writing is reader-friendly, inviting the reader to join you in your writing. For example, I have now switched to informal expression. I want to talk directly to and engage my reader.
Keep in mind, too, that most published writing is a mixture of the two styles.
Which to use? The situation will dictate that requirement. Your boss will dictate that requirement. I have tried to show you in the last five blogs how to change your informal expression to formal expression, if you need to, by removing contractions, general words without clear reference and needless repetition and by changing the “I” and/or “you” points of view to third person.
To you as a reader, the conversational tone is engaging. Informal expression has considerable value to you as a writer. When you are not sure what you want to say, you can begin writing by using informal expression. Begin as if you are writing a letter, for example. However, if formal expression is required, then you will need to remove the contractions, general words, and needless repetition and then change the point of view to the third.
Beyond the conventional requirement of formal English in certain situations, why is formal expression desirable? As I read e-mails, I am quick to note people who are careful writers. They always strike me as people who have learned to write. The most significant characteristic is that they do not repeat words unnecessarily, one of the most frequent problems with inexperienced writers who tend to write as they speak.
The value of formal, precise, clear expression is perhaps best summed up in the following quotes from experts on writing:
Zinsser says that good writing “…has an aliveness that keeps the reader reading from one paragraph to the next” (On Writing Well).
Herbert Spencer defined writing style as “that which requires the least effort of understanding” (Durant, The Story of Philosophy, “Herbert Spencer”).
James Thurber described his purpose for rewriting as “…a constant attempt on my part to make the finished version smooth, to make it seem effortless” (Cowley, ed. Writers at Work).
Formal expression accomplishes those goals. Formal expression communicates precisely and clearly, keeps the reader reading with the least effort of understanding and makes the finished piece of writing seem effortless.
All the best. RayS.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Informal and Formal Expression 04
Question: How do informal and formal expression differ?
Answer: Informal expression is conversational. The characteristics of conversational writing are using the “I” and/or “you” point of view; general words like “there,” “it,” “get,” “thing” and the demonstrative pronouns (“this,” “that,” “these” “those”) without clear antecedents, needless repetition, and contractions. Formal expression eliminates the preceding characteristics of conversation, uses the third-person point of view and aims at precise and clear meaning.
Yesterday, I suggested that beginning sentences with the word “There” was often repetitious, less direct than using the actual subject of the sentence and likely to result in a grammatical, subject/verb agreement problem.
Today: The problems with “it,” “thing,” “get” include the tendency to needless repetition and distracting the reader because the exact meaning is not clear.
Note: I am again using “idiot sentences,” sentences that clearly illustrate the solutions to problems, although they are not very interesting ideas.
The Pronoun “It”
Needless repetition is a problem in coherence because the reader cannot follow the changes in meaning of the various uses of “it.” The pronoun “it,” while a perfectly good pronoun when used sparingly, is frequently repeated unnecessarily by students, creating problems in clear reference as well as lack of precision. One of my college students used “it” 50 times in a five-paragraph composition.
Reference problem: “He had no idea what it contained.” Clear reference: “He had no idea what the package contained.”
Problem with repetition: “He bought it, didn’t like it, and returned it to the store from which he had bought it.”
Clear reference: “He bought the 13-inch TV set, disliked the small screen and blurry picture, and returned what he considered to be defective merchandise to the store from which he purchased it.”
In the second case, the writer eliminated three uses of the word “it,” and reserved the final “it” for the original purpose of pronouns—avoiding, in this case, the needless repetition of the word “TV.” The effect of eliminating the repeated use of “it” is to increase precision in expression and enable the reader to follow the flow of thought.
The Noun “Thing.”
“Thing” is another word too frequently used by student writers, resulting in a lack of precision and uncertainty as to what “thing” refers to.
Less precise: “There was not a thing I could do as he began to slip through the ice.”
More precise: “I watched helplessly as he began to slip through the ice.”
This writer eliminated “There” as well as the noun “thing” and achieves greater precision in expression.
The Verb “Get.”
“Get,” with its many forms (“getting,” “got”) is probably the champion of words frequently repeated by student writers. My advice to students when they use the same word two or more times is to try three strategies:
1. Simply drop one of the repeated words; see if the sentence makes sense without it.
2. Find a synonym; this strategy sometimes improves precision in word choice.
3. But the third method, even if it requires some extra work, is usually the best for eliminating needlessly repeated words: rearrange the sentence to avoid using a word a second or third time in the same or adjoining sentences.
Needless repetition: “He was getting used to accepting how tall he was getting.”
No repetition: “He had become resigned to growing taller than everyone else.”
Tomorrow: The problems with demonstrative pronouns (“this,” “that,” “these,” those”) without clear antecedents. Final thoughts on the use of informal and/or formal expression.
Answer: Informal expression is conversational. The characteristics of conversational writing are using the “I” and/or “you” point of view; general words like “there,” “it,” “get,” “thing” and the demonstrative pronouns (“this,” “that,” “these” “those”) without clear antecedents, needless repetition, and contractions. Formal expression eliminates the preceding characteristics of conversation, uses the third-person point of view and aims at precise and clear meaning.
Yesterday, I suggested that beginning sentences with the word “There” was often repetitious, less direct than using the actual subject of the sentence and likely to result in a grammatical, subject/verb agreement problem.
Today: The problems with “it,” “thing,” “get” include the tendency to needless repetition and distracting the reader because the exact meaning is not clear.
Note: I am again using “idiot sentences,” sentences that clearly illustrate the solutions to problems, although they are not very interesting ideas.
The Pronoun “It”
Needless repetition is a problem in coherence because the reader cannot follow the changes in meaning of the various uses of “it.” The pronoun “it,” while a perfectly good pronoun when used sparingly, is frequently repeated unnecessarily by students, creating problems in clear reference as well as lack of precision. One of my college students used “it” 50 times in a five-paragraph composition.
Reference problem: “He had no idea what it contained.” Clear reference: “He had no idea what the package contained.”
Problem with repetition: “He bought it, didn’t like it, and returned it to the store from which he had bought it.”
Clear reference: “He bought the 13-inch TV set, disliked the small screen and blurry picture, and returned what he considered to be defective merchandise to the store from which he purchased it.”
In the second case, the writer eliminated three uses of the word “it,” and reserved the final “it” for the original purpose of pronouns—avoiding, in this case, the needless repetition of the word “TV.” The effect of eliminating the repeated use of “it” is to increase precision in expression and enable the reader to follow the flow of thought.
The Noun “Thing.”
“Thing” is another word too frequently used by student writers, resulting in a lack of precision and uncertainty as to what “thing” refers to.
Less precise: “There was not a thing I could do as he began to slip through the ice.”
More precise: “I watched helplessly as he began to slip through the ice.”
This writer eliminated “There” as well as the noun “thing” and achieves greater precision in expression.
The Verb “Get.”
“Get,” with its many forms (“getting,” “got”) is probably the champion of words frequently repeated by student writers. My advice to students when they use the same word two or more times is to try three strategies:
1. Simply drop one of the repeated words; see if the sentence makes sense without it.
2. Find a synonym; this strategy sometimes improves precision in word choice.
3. But the third method, even if it requires some extra work, is usually the best for eliminating needlessly repeated words: rearrange the sentence to avoid using a word a second or third time in the same or adjoining sentences.
Needless repetition: “He was getting used to accepting how tall he was getting.”
No repetition: “He had become resigned to growing taller than everyone else.”
Tomorrow: The problems with demonstrative pronouns (“this,” “that,” “these,” those”) without clear antecedents. Final thoughts on the use of informal and/or formal expression.
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Informal and Formal Writing 03
Question: How are informal and formal writing different?
Answer: Informal writing is conversational. Formal writing aims for precise expression.
Today: What are some problems with informal writing?
While I have praised informal writing as reader- and writer-friendly, I must emphasize that the ultimate goal of communication in writing is achieving clear, precise meaning. The best example of formal expression in American history is Lincoln’s “Gettysburg Address”: Not a word is wasted. Every word counts. The words are precise and the meaning is clear.
The problem with most students in writing is learning to express themselves in formal English. They come to my classes writing as they speak—informally (I call it “speakwrite”)—and I need to show them how to write—and speak—formally.
In this and the following sessions, I want to demonstrate the problems with “speakwrite” or informal writing, the problems with using “there,” “get,” “it,” “thing,” and demonstrative pronouns (“this,” “that,” “these,” “those”) without clear antecedents.
The First Problem with “Speakwrite” or informal writing: Repetition.
All of these expressions are repeated unnecessarily. Unnecessary repetition is one of the characteristics of people who do not write carefully. People who do not write carefully usually have problems expressing their ideas clearly. I have seen the pronoun “it” repeated as many as fifteen times in a single, moderately sized paragraph. With so many repetitions, the reader has difficulty following the meaning of "it."
Specific problems with “There.”
Beginning a sentence with the expletive “There” is both a problem in coherence and in subject/verb agreement. Coherence (or “flow of thought”) can be improved when “There” is replaced by the actual subject of the sentence.
Begins with "There": “There are seven vegetables in this salad.”
Begins with the subject: “This salad is a combination of seven vegetables.”
Beginning a sentence with “There” can also create a subject/verb agreement problem:
Subject/verb problem: “There’s seven vegetables in this salad.”
Corrected: “There are seven vegetables in this salad.”
Better: “This salad is a combination of seven vegetables.”
Although beginning sentences with “There” helps to make writing more conversational, student writers tend to overuse the word, and I, therefore, discourage them from beginning sentences with “There” altogether. Eliminating the word "There" at the beginning of sentences will increase precision and "flow" significantly.
Tomorrow: What are the problems with “get,” “it,” “thing”?
Answer: Informal writing is conversational. Formal writing aims for precise expression.
Today: What are some problems with informal writing?
While I have praised informal writing as reader- and writer-friendly, I must emphasize that the ultimate goal of communication in writing is achieving clear, precise meaning. The best example of formal expression in American history is Lincoln’s “Gettysburg Address”: Not a word is wasted. Every word counts. The words are precise and the meaning is clear.
The problem with most students in writing is learning to express themselves in formal English. They come to my classes writing as they speak—informally (I call it “speakwrite”)—and I need to show them how to write—and speak—formally.
In this and the following sessions, I want to demonstrate the problems with “speakwrite” or informal writing, the problems with using “there,” “get,” “it,” “thing,” and demonstrative pronouns (“this,” “that,” “these,” “those”) without clear antecedents.
The First Problem with “Speakwrite” or informal writing: Repetition.
All of these expressions are repeated unnecessarily. Unnecessary repetition is one of the characteristics of people who do not write carefully. People who do not write carefully usually have problems expressing their ideas clearly. I have seen the pronoun “it” repeated as many as fifteen times in a single, moderately sized paragraph. With so many repetitions, the reader has difficulty following the meaning of "it."
Specific problems with “There.”
Beginning a sentence with the expletive “There” is both a problem in coherence and in subject/verb agreement. Coherence (or “flow of thought”) can be improved when “There” is replaced by the actual subject of the sentence.
Begins with "There": “There are seven vegetables in this salad.”
Begins with the subject: “This salad is a combination of seven vegetables.”
Beginning a sentence with “There” can also create a subject/verb agreement problem:
Subject/verb problem: “There’s seven vegetables in this salad.”
Corrected: “There are seven vegetables in this salad.”
Better: “This salad is a combination of seven vegetables.”
Although beginning sentences with “There” helps to make writing more conversational, student writers tend to overuse the word, and I, therefore, discourage them from beginning sentences with “There” altogether. Eliminating the word "There" at the beginning of sentences will increase precision and "flow" significantly.
Tomorrow: What are the problems with “get,” “it,” “thing”?
Monday, July 16, 2007
Informal and Formal Writing 02
Question: How are informal and formal writing different?
Answer: Informal writing is conversational, characterized by the use of contractions; general words like “there,” “get,” “it” and “thing”; needless repetition; demonstrative pronouns (“this,” “that,” “these,” “those”) without clear antecedents; beginning sentences with “And” and “But”; and using the “I” and “you” points of view. Formal written expression uses the third person point of view, eliminates the conversational characteristics and aims to achieve clear and precise meaning.
The following paragraph is an example of informal written expression:
I like informal English. I like not worrying about using precise words. “Get,” “there,” “it” and “thing” are good enough for me, even if I do repeat them more than I should. It’s just like talking naturally. People who write formally are stuffy. They write with their nose in the air. When you write informally, You feel as if you are conversing with your readers and your readers think you are talking directly to them. That’s why I like writing informally. It just feels natural.
Does formal expression communicate more effectively than informal expression? The following paragraph attempts to revise the previous paragraph in order to produce formal expression:
Many people are more comfortable when writing informally. They do not have to struggle to find the exact words. People who use formal expression try to be more precise. Instead of “Get happy!” they say, “Be happy!” They never begin sentences with “There.” For “it,” they use “The Panasonic LCD flat-panel television set”; for “…couldn’t do a thing,” they write “…could not enter the doorway because the house was engulfed in flames.” They try to eliminate needless repetition. People who prefer informal expression feel as if they are conversing with their readers and their readers feel as if the writers are speaking directly to them. That feeling of personal contact makes writing and reading more effective. Writing informally feels natural.
Is formal written expression superior to informal writing? Informal expression has the advantage of what feels like personal contact between reader and writer. Formal expression is more precise, and, at least in this example, produces more words (for “it,” “the Panasonic LCD, flat-panel television set”).
Certain circumstances require formal written expression: term papers and writing assignments in school; reports in business settings; articles in professional journals, etc. On the other hand, depending on the personalities of your boss or your colleagues, informal memos might be more effective than a formal style.
As I said before, most real-world publications are a mixture of both formal and informal styles. Circumstances and requirements will dictate formal and/or informal expression. What is important is knowing which to use and when and how to translate informal expression into formal expression when needed.
Tomorrow, I will discuss individual characteristics of informal expression: “there,” “get,” “it,” “thing” and the use of clear antecedents with “this,” “that,” “these,” and “those.”
All the best. RayS.
Answer: Informal writing is conversational, characterized by the use of contractions; general words like “there,” “get,” “it” and “thing”; needless repetition; demonstrative pronouns (“this,” “that,” “these,” “those”) without clear antecedents; beginning sentences with “And” and “But”; and using the “I” and “you” points of view. Formal written expression uses the third person point of view, eliminates the conversational characteristics and aims to achieve clear and precise meaning.
The following paragraph is an example of informal written expression:
I like informal English. I like not worrying about using precise words. “Get,” “there,” “it” and “thing” are good enough for me, even if I do repeat them more than I should. It’s just like talking naturally. People who write formally are stuffy. They write with their nose in the air. When you write informally, You feel as if you are conversing with your readers and your readers think you are talking directly to them. That’s why I like writing informally. It just feels natural.
Does formal expression communicate more effectively than informal expression? The following paragraph attempts to revise the previous paragraph in order to produce formal expression:
Many people are more comfortable when writing informally. They do not have to struggle to find the exact words. People who use formal expression try to be more precise. Instead of “Get happy!” they say, “Be happy!” They never begin sentences with “There.” For “it,” they use “The Panasonic LCD flat-panel television set”; for “…couldn’t do a thing,” they write “…could not enter the doorway because the house was engulfed in flames.” They try to eliminate needless repetition. People who prefer informal expression feel as if they are conversing with their readers and their readers feel as if the writers are speaking directly to them. That feeling of personal contact makes writing and reading more effective. Writing informally feels natural.
Is formal written expression superior to informal writing? Informal expression has the advantage of what feels like personal contact between reader and writer. Formal expression is more precise, and, at least in this example, produces more words (for “it,” “the Panasonic LCD, flat-panel television set”).
Certain circumstances require formal written expression: term papers and writing assignments in school; reports in business settings; articles in professional journals, etc. On the other hand, depending on the personalities of your boss or your colleagues, informal memos might be more effective than a formal style.
As I said before, most real-world publications are a mixture of both formal and informal styles. Circumstances and requirements will dictate formal and/or informal expression. What is important is knowing which to use and when and how to translate informal expression into formal expression when needed.
Tomorrow, I will discuss individual characteristics of informal expression: “there,” “get,” “it,” “thing” and the use of clear antecedents with “this,” “that,” “these,” and “those.”
All the best. RayS.
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Informal and Formal Writing
Question: What are the differences between informal and formal writing?
Answer: Informal writing is much like conversational speaking. Formal writing aims for clear, precise expression.
In informal writing, we use contractions; needless repetition; words like "there," "get," "thing" and "it" that rob our writing of precision. We also use the "demonstrative pronouns," "this," "that," "these" and "those" without clearly establishing their antecedents, the words to which they refer. Beginning sentences with "And" and "But" would also be classified as conversational. However, the most significant characteristic of informal English is using the 'I" and "you" points of view.
The value of conversational, informal writing is that it connects with readers and readers respond as if to a conversation. Informal writing is also easier for writers. In fact, when you aren't sure of what you want to say, you might find it easier if you say what you think you want to say as informally as possible, and then transform it into formal English. Use the "I" point of view to begin.
Formal writing means eliminating most of the characteristics of informal, conversational expression--contractions; needless repetition; "there," "get," "thing," "it"; demonstrative pronouns without clear antecedents; beginning sentences with "And" and "But" and using the "I" and "you" points of view. Formal written expression uses the third-person point of view. Formal writing aims at clear, precise expression.
In the real world, informal and formal styles are often mixed.
Tomorrow, I will give you an example of a paragraph written informally compared to the same paragraph written formally.
All the best. RayS.
Answer: Informal writing is much like conversational speaking. Formal writing aims for clear, precise expression.
In informal writing, we use contractions; needless repetition; words like "there," "get," "thing" and "it" that rob our writing of precision. We also use the "demonstrative pronouns," "this," "that," "these" and "those" without clearly establishing their antecedents, the words to which they refer. Beginning sentences with "And" and "But" would also be classified as conversational. However, the most significant characteristic of informal English is using the 'I" and "you" points of view.
The value of conversational, informal writing is that it connects with readers and readers respond as if to a conversation. Informal writing is also easier for writers. In fact, when you aren't sure of what you want to say, you might find it easier if you say what you think you want to say as informally as possible, and then transform it into formal English. Use the "I" point of view to begin.
Formal writing means eliminating most of the characteristics of informal, conversational expression--contractions; needless repetition; "there," "get," "thing," "it"; demonstrative pronouns without clear antecedents; beginning sentences with "And" and "But" and using the "I" and "you" points of view. Formal written expression uses the third-person point of view. Formal writing aims at clear, precise expression.
In the real world, informal and formal styles are often mixed.
Tomorrow, I will give you an example of a paragraph written informally compared to the same paragraph written formally.
All the best. RayS.
Friday, July 13, 2007
Sentence Combining 05
Question: Where can I find some ready-made sentence-combining exercises?
Answer: The Internet.
Here is the original paragraph by Borland from the essay entitled “Rain” from Twelve Moons of the Year.
Original paragraph by Borland: We talk of water shortages, yet water is one of the enduring constants of our environment. Man, not water, is the variable. And man himself has created the growing scarcity of clean water by his careless poisoning and pollution. Yet, rain is water, rain is wet. But like it or not, a rainy day is a blessing to the earth and everything that lives upon it.
This is how I would have broken its sentences into kernels:
RayS.’s attempt at creating kernel sentences from the original paragraph: We talk. We have water shortages. Water endures in our environment. Water is a constant in our environment. Man is the variable. Water is not the variable. Man has created scarcity. Clean water is scarce. Man poisons water carelessly. Man pollutes water carelessly. Rain is water. Rain is wet. Like it or not. A rainy day is a blessing. Rain is good for the earth. Rain is good for everything that lives.
I placed in bold face what I considered to be an interesting sentence structure.
To review: The purpose of sentence-combining exercises is to learn to vary sentence structure, to help make your sentences flow, to recognize and use sentence structures different from your usual patterns, to help start you writing when you’re blocked and to be part of your revision by checking to see if you can combine some of your sentences as you prepare your final draft. .
Creating your own sentence-combining exercises: You can create your own sentence-combining exercises by finding paragraphs from books, magazines and newspapers, breaking each sentence into it component ideas or kernels and then combining the kernels to try to reproduce the original paragraph. Ask yourself, “What have I learned about sentences from this exercise?” Collect sentences that are different from your usual sentence patterns.
For further practice: Suppose you don’t feel like making the effort to break down paragraphs into kernel sentences? Simple. Type “sentence combining” into the Google search engine and you will be greeted with 1,890,000 Web sites dealing with sentence combining. I checked the first 25 and just about every site gives example after example of kernel sentences that you can combine. One site even had “Goldilocks and the Three Bears” broken down into kernel sentences. Some of the sites accompany the kernel sentences with grammatical explanations. For me, grammatical terminology gets in the way. Others may welcome the opportunity to catch up on their grammar.
Next week: Transforming informal written expression into formal written expression.
All the best. RayS.
Answer: The Internet.
Here is the original paragraph by Borland from the essay entitled “Rain” from Twelve Moons of the Year.
Original paragraph by Borland: We talk of water shortages, yet water is one of the enduring constants of our environment. Man, not water, is the variable. And man himself has created the growing scarcity of clean water by his careless poisoning and pollution. Yet, rain is water, rain is wet. But like it or not, a rainy day is a blessing to the earth and everything that lives upon it.
This is how I would have broken its sentences into kernels:
RayS.’s attempt at creating kernel sentences from the original paragraph: We talk. We have water shortages. Water endures in our environment. Water is a constant in our environment. Man is the variable. Water is not the variable. Man has created scarcity. Clean water is scarce. Man poisons water carelessly. Man pollutes water carelessly. Rain is water. Rain is wet. Like it or not. A rainy day is a blessing. Rain is good for the earth. Rain is good for everything that lives.
I placed in bold face what I considered to be an interesting sentence structure.
To review: The purpose of sentence-combining exercises is to learn to vary sentence structure, to help make your sentences flow, to recognize and use sentence structures different from your usual patterns, to help start you writing when you’re blocked and to be part of your revision by checking to see if you can combine some of your sentences as you prepare your final draft. .
Creating your own sentence-combining exercises: You can create your own sentence-combining exercises by finding paragraphs from books, magazines and newspapers, breaking each sentence into it component ideas or kernels and then combining the kernels to try to reproduce the original paragraph. Ask yourself, “What have I learned about sentences from this exercise?” Collect sentences that are different from your usual sentence patterns.
For further practice: Suppose you don’t feel like making the effort to break down paragraphs into kernel sentences? Simple. Type “sentence combining” into the Google search engine and you will be greeted with 1,890,000 Web sites dealing with sentence combining. I checked the first 25 and just about every site gives example after example of kernel sentences that you can combine. One site even had “Goldilocks and the Three Bears” broken down into kernel sentences. Some of the sites accompany the kernel sentences with grammatical explanations. For me, grammatical terminology gets in the way. Others may welcome the opportunity to catch up on their grammar.
Next week: Transforming informal written expression into formal written expression.
All the best. RayS.
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Sentence Combining 04
Question: How do I create sentence-combining exercises?
Answer: Take paragraphs from books, magazines or newspapers and break the sentences down to their component ideas or kernels. Then, without looking at the original, try to reconstruct the sentence kernels into the original paragraph.
First, here are the kernel sentences from yesterday’s essay by Hal Borland on “The Succulent Bean” in The Twelve Moons of the Year, followed by Hal’s original paragraph. How close did you come to his original? And what did you learn about sentence structure from the exercise?
Kernels. The bean is strange. It is a vegetable. It provides food for man. It provides food for beast. It is like all members of the legume family. It grows in soil. It enriches the soil. It is edible when green. It is edible when dried. It comes to the table. It is green. It is a snap bean. It is fresh from the garden It is properly cooked. It is properly buttered. It is most satisfying. It is an early yield from the garden. Later it is a challenge to every gardener. The gardener challenges every neighbor. The gardener challenges every weekender. The gardener challenges every casual visitor. The gardener will beg them to take beans. The gardener will try to be rid of them. That is later. Now it is a treasure. Now it is a gustatory delight.
Original. The bean is a strange vegetable. It provides food for man and beast and, like all members of the legume family, it enriches the soil in which it grows. It is edible both green and dried. Just now it comes to the table in green form, the snap bean fresh from the garden. Properly cooked and buttered, it is one of the most satisfying of all early garden yield. Later it will be a challenge to every gardener alive--every neighbor, every weekender, every casual visitor--will be begged to take beans, just to be rid of them. But that’s for later. Just now it is a treasure and a gustatory delight.
Again, from Borland’s Twelve Moons of the Year, here is Borland’s original first paragraph from his essay for July 12, “Rain.”
Original. We fret over a rainy day, resent a rainy weekend or vacation. Rain makes us miserable. Rain is wet. We prefer sunshine, for a rainy day is dull and damp and uncomfortable.
Now “deconstruct” the original sentences into their component ideas:
Kernels. We fret. The day is rainy. We resent a rainy weekend. We resent a rainy vacation. We are miserable in rain. Rain is wet. We prefer sunshine. A rainy day is dull A rainy day is damp. A rainy day is uncomfortable.
Next, don't look at the original and try to reconstruct the sentence kernels into the original paragraph.
Finally, here is another Borland original paragraph on the same subject of rain:
Original. We talk of water shortages, yet water is one of the enduring constants of our environment. Man, not water, is the variable. And man himself has created the growing scarcity of clean water by his careless poisoning and pollution. Yet, rain is water, rain is wet. But like it or not, a rainy day is a blessing to the earth and everything that lives upon it.
Tomorrow, I will suggest how I would have broken this paragraph into kernel sentences. Once you have broken the paragraph into kernel sentences, put the original aside and try to reconstruct the paragraph. Then, ask yourself, “What have I learned about sentence structure from this exercise?” To help you remember, underline the interesting structures in the original paragraph.
All the best. RayS.
Answer: Take paragraphs from books, magazines or newspapers and break the sentences down to their component ideas or kernels. Then, without looking at the original, try to reconstruct the sentence kernels into the original paragraph.
First, here are the kernel sentences from yesterday’s essay by Hal Borland on “The Succulent Bean” in The Twelve Moons of the Year, followed by Hal’s original paragraph. How close did you come to his original? And what did you learn about sentence structure from the exercise?
Kernels. The bean is strange. It is a vegetable. It provides food for man. It provides food for beast. It is like all members of the legume family. It grows in soil. It enriches the soil. It is edible when green. It is edible when dried. It comes to the table. It is green. It is a snap bean. It is fresh from the garden It is properly cooked. It is properly buttered. It is most satisfying. It is an early yield from the garden. Later it is a challenge to every gardener. The gardener challenges every neighbor. The gardener challenges every weekender. The gardener challenges every casual visitor. The gardener will beg them to take beans. The gardener will try to be rid of them. That is later. Now it is a treasure. Now it is a gustatory delight.
Original. The bean is a strange vegetable. It provides food for man and beast and, like all members of the legume family, it enriches the soil in which it grows. It is edible both green and dried. Just now it comes to the table in green form, the snap bean fresh from the garden. Properly cooked and buttered, it is one of the most satisfying of all early garden yield. Later it will be a challenge to every gardener alive--every neighbor, every weekender, every casual visitor--will be begged to take beans, just to be rid of them. But that’s for later. Just now it is a treasure and a gustatory delight.
What did I learn about sentence structure from the exercise? I have marked certain structures in the original in bold face as interesting groupings of words within sentences.
Constructing sentence-combining exercises. Taking the time to break paragraphs from publications into kernel sentences and then putting them together again has some significant advantages in learning to improve your writing. You will begin to recognize and practice certain, sometimes unfamiliar, sentence patterns.Again, from Borland’s Twelve Moons of the Year, here is Borland’s original first paragraph from his essay for July 12, “Rain.”
Original. We fret over a rainy day, resent a rainy weekend or vacation. Rain makes us miserable. Rain is wet. We prefer sunshine, for a rainy day is dull and damp and uncomfortable.
Now “deconstruct” the original sentences into their component ideas:
Kernels. We fret. The day is rainy. We resent a rainy weekend. We resent a rainy vacation. We are miserable in rain. Rain is wet. We prefer sunshine. A rainy day is dull A rainy day is damp. A rainy day is uncomfortable.
Next, don't look at the original and try to reconstruct the sentence kernels into the original paragraph.
Finally, here is another Borland original paragraph on the same subject of rain:
Original. We talk of water shortages, yet water is one of the enduring constants of our environment. Man, not water, is the variable. And man himself has created the growing scarcity of clean water by his careless poisoning and pollution. Yet, rain is water, rain is wet. But like it or not, a rainy day is a blessing to the earth and everything that lives upon it.
Tomorrow, I will suggest how I would have broken this paragraph into kernel sentences. Once you have broken the paragraph into kernel sentences, put the original aside and try to reconstruct the paragraph. Then, ask yourself, “What have I learned about sentence structure from this exercise?” To help you remember, underline the interesting structures in the original paragraph.
All the best. RayS.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Sentence Combining 03
Question: What is the value of sentence combining exercises?
Answer: Sentence combining exercises enable you to experiment with sentence structure, to play with different types of structures within the sentence and to develop smooth expression that flows from beginning to end of a paragraph. Practicing some sentence combining exercises when you don’t feel like writing will start you on your way. When you are revising your own work, note whether combining some sentences will improve your expression.
Yesterday, I asked you to try combining the kernel sentences in the following paragraph from July 6 in Hal Borland’s Twelve Moons of the Year, a chronology of the New England seasons:
In North America, there are 90,000 species of insects. 25,000 of these species are beetles. Beetles are everywhere. Beetles click. Beetles creep. Beetles gnaw. Beetles pillage. Beetles scavenge. Beetles even light the night. Dragonflies have not changed much in 300 million years. Dragonflies clatter in flight. Dragonflies stare you down. Dragonflies live on smaller insects. Flies are ubiquitous. So are mosquitoes. Mosquitoes are insatiable. Flies and mosquitoes thrive everywhere. Flies and mosquitoes thrive in heat. Flies and mosquitoes thrive in humidity. Butterflies spangle. The afternoons are hot. Moths are big. Moths are dusky. Moths haunt the garden. The evening is cool.
Here is Borland’s original paragraph:
There are almost 90,000 species of insects in North America and 25,000 of them are beetles. Beetles are everywhere, clicking, creeping, gnawing, pillaging, scavenging, even lighting the night; dragonflies, little changed in 300 million years, clatter in flight, stare you down, and live on still smaller insects. The ubiquitous flies and the insatiable mosquitoes thrive everywhere in heat and humidity. Butterflies spangle the hot afternoon and big, dusky moths haunt the garden in the cool of the evening.
Did you think some of your sentences were better than Borland’s?
Here is another paragraph from Borland. I have taken the ideas of his original paragraph apart and turned them into “kernels.” This one is from July 8, entitled, “The Succulent Bean.”
The bean is strange. It is a vegetable. It provides food for man. It provides food for beast. It is like all members of the legume family. It grows in soil. It enriches the soil. It is edible when green. It is edible when dried. It comes to the table. It is green. It is a snap bean. It is fresh from the garden It is properly cooked. It is properly buttered. It is most satisfying. It is an early yield from the garden. Later it is a challenge to every gardener. The gardener challenges every neighbor. The gardener challenges every weekender. The gardener challenges every casual visitor. The gardener will beg them to take beans. The gardener will try to be rid of them. That is later. Now it is a treasure. Now it is a gustatory delight.
Your purpose is to combine the kernels into sentences that will produce a smooth paragraph. Most of the kernels are in the original order of Borland’s paragraph. Feel free to add and subtract words. Tomorrow, I will give you Borland’s original and tell you how to created your own sentence-combining exercises.
All the best. RayS.
Answer: Sentence combining exercises enable you to experiment with sentence structure, to play with different types of structures within the sentence and to develop smooth expression that flows from beginning to end of a paragraph. Practicing some sentence combining exercises when you don’t feel like writing will start you on your way. When you are revising your own work, note whether combining some sentences will improve your expression.
Yesterday, I asked you to try combining the kernel sentences in the following paragraph from July 6 in Hal Borland’s Twelve Moons of the Year, a chronology of the New England seasons:
In North America, there are 90,000 species of insects. 25,000 of these species are beetles. Beetles are everywhere. Beetles click. Beetles creep. Beetles gnaw. Beetles pillage. Beetles scavenge. Beetles even light the night. Dragonflies have not changed much in 300 million years. Dragonflies clatter in flight. Dragonflies stare you down. Dragonflies live on smaller insects. Flies are ubiquitous. So are mosquitoes. Mosquitoes are insatiable. Flies and mosquitoes thrive everywhere. Flies and mosquitoes thrive in heat. Flies and mosquitoes thrive in humidity. Butterflies spangle. The afternoons are hot. Moths are big. Moths are dusky. Moths haunt the garden. The evening is cool.
Here is Borland’s original paragraph:
There are almost 90,000 species of insects in North America and 25,000 of them are beetles. Beetles are everywhere, clicking, creeping, gnawing, pillaging, scavenging, even lighting the night; dragonflies, little changed in 300 million years, clatter in flight, stare you down, and live on still smaller insects. The ubiquitous flies and the insatiable mosquitoes thrive everywhere in heat and humidity. Butterflies spangle the hot afternoon and big, dusky moths haunt the garden in the cool of the evening.
Did you think some of your sentences were better than Borland’s?
Here is another paragraph from Borland. I have taken the ideas of his original paragraph apart and turned them into “kernels.” This one is from July 8, entitled, “The Succulent Bean.”
The bean is strange. It is a vegetable. It provides food for man. It provides food for beast. It is like all members of the legume family. It grows in soil. It enriches the soil. It is edible when green. It is edible when dried. It comes to the table. It is green. It is a snap bean. It is fresh from the garden It is properly cooked. It is properly buttered. It is most satisfying. It is an early yield from the garden. Later it is a challenge to every gardener. The gardener challenges every neighbor. The gardener challenges every weekender. The gardener challenges every casual visitor. The gardener will beg them to take beans. The gardener will try to be rid of them. That is later. Now it is a treasure. Now it is a gustatory delight.
Your purpose is to combine the kernels into sentences that will produce a smooth paragraph. Most of the kernels are in the original order of Borland’s paragraph. Feel free to add and subtract words. Tomorrow, I will give you Borland’s original and tell you how to created your own sentence-combining exercises.
All the best. RayS.
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Sentence Combining 02
Question: What is the value of sentence combining exercises?
Answer: Sentence combining exercises enable you to experiment with sentence structure, to play with different types of structures within the sentence and to develop smooth expression that flows from beginning to end of a paragraph. Practicing some sentence combining exercises when you don’t feel like writing will start you on your way. When you are revising your own work, note whether combining some sentences will improve your expression.
Yesterday, I combined some kernel sentences from a quote by JFK.
Kernel sentences: There are many Americans. They have lost their way. They have lost their will. They have lost their sense of history. They have lost their sense of purpose.
Combined: Many Americans have lost their way, their will, their purpose and their sense of history.
Combined: Having lost their way and will, many Americans no longer have an historic sense of purpose.
Combined: With their will and way lost, many Americans no longer have a sense of purpose from history.
Combined: Many Americans have lost their way, have lost their will, have lost their sense of history and have lost their purpose.
Combined: Because many Americans have lost their way and will, they have also lost their sense of history and of purpose.
Here is JFK’s original quote: “Too many Americans have lost their way, their will, and their sense of historic purpose.” Schlesinger, A Thousand Days.
In this particular case, JFK’s was probably the best expression of the idea. However, keep in mind that in combining the kernel sentences, no sentence is correct or incorrect. Just because the authors’ originals differ from your efforts at combining does not mean that the originals are necessarily better. The purpose of sentence combining exercises is to play with sentence structure.
Now let’s see if you can combine a longer series of kernel sentences. For many years, Hal Borland wrote essays in the Sunday New York Times on the changing New England seasons. A collection of these essays—one essay for each day of the year—was completed by his wife Barbara after he died while he was in the midst of arranging the collection. The title of the book is Twelve Moons of the Year. The title of this particular essay is “The Hordes” for July 6. What follows are the kernel sentences of the second paragraph of the essay. How would you combine these kernel sentences into a paragraph? Borland’s original will appear tomorrow.
In North America, there are 90,000 species of insects. 25,000 of these species are beetles. Beetles are everywhere. Beetles click. Beetles creep. Beetles gnaw. Beetles pillage. Beetles scavenge. Beetles even light the night. Dragonflies have not changed much in 300 million years. Dragonflies clatter in flight. Dragonflies stare you down. Dragonflies live on smaller insects. Flies are ubiquitous. So are mosquitoes. Mosquitoes are insatiable. Flies and mosquitoes thrive everywhere. Flies and mosquitoes thrive in heat. Flies and mosquitoes thrive in humidity. Butterflies spangle. The afternoons are hot. Moths are big. Moths are dusky. Moths haunt the garden. The evening is cool.
Your purpose is to combine the kernels into sentences that will produce a smooth paragraph. Most of the kernels are in the original order of Borland’s paragraph. Feel free to add and subtract words. Tomorrow, I will give you Borland’s original.
All the best. RayS.
Answer: Sentence combining exercises enable you to experiment with sentence structure, to play with different types of structures within the sentence and to develop smooth expression that flows from beginning to end of a paragraph. Practicing some sentence combining exercises when you don’t feel like writing will start you on your way. When you are revising your own work, note whether combining some sentences will improve your expression.
Yesterday, I combined some kernel sentences from a quote by JFK.
Kernel sentences: There are many Americans. They have lost their way. They have lost their will. They have lost their sense of history. They have lost their sense of purpose.
Combined: Many Americans have lost their way, their will, their purpose and their sense of history.
Combined: Having lost their way and will, many Americans no longer have an historic sense of purpose.
Combined: With their will and way lost, many Americans no longer have a sense of purpose from history.
Combined: Many Americans have lost their way, have lost their will, have lost their sense of history and have lost their purpose.
Combined: Because many Americans have lost their way and will, they have also lost their sense of history and of purpose.
Here is JFK’s original quote: “Too many Americans have lost their way, their will, and their sense of historic purpose.” Schlesinger, A Thousand Days.
In this particular case, JFK’s was probably the best expression of the idea. However, keep in mind that in combining the kernel sentences, no sentence is correct or incorrect. Just because the authors’ originals differ from your efforts at combining does not mean that the originals are necessarily better. The purpose of sentence combining exercises is to play with sentence structure.
Now let’s see if you can combine a longer series of kernel sentences. For many years, Hal Borland wrote essays in the Sunday New York Times on the changing New England seasons. A collection of these essays—one essay for each day of the year—was completed by his wife Barbara after he died while he was in the midst of arranging the collection. The title of the book is Twelve Moons of the Year. The title of this particular essay is “The Hordes” for July 6. What follows are the kernel sentences of the second paragraph of the essay. How would you combine these kernel sentences into a paragraph? Borland’s original will appear tomorrow.
In North America, there are 90,000 species of insects. 25,000 of these species are beetles. Beetles are everywhere. Beetles click. Beetles creep. Beetles gnaw. Beetles pillage. Beetles scavenge. Beetles even light the night. Dragonflies have not changed much in 300 million years. Dragonflies clatter in flight. Dragonflies stare you down. Dragonflies live on smaller insects. Flies are ubiquitous. So are mosquitoes. Mosquitoes are insatiable. Flies and mosquitoes thrive everywhere. Flies and mosquitoes thrive in heat. Flies and mosquitoes thrive in humidity. Butterflies spangle. The afternoons are hot. Moths are big. Moths are dusky. Moths haunt the garden. The evening is cool.
Your purpose is to combine the kernels into sentences that will produce a smooth paragraph. Most of the kernels are in the original order of Borland’s paragraph. Feel free to add and subtract words. Tomorrow, I will give you Borland’s original.
All the best. RayS.
Friday, July 6, 2007
Sentence Combining 01
Question: What is the value of sentence combining?
Answer: Practice in sentence combining can improve style and flow of expression. Sentence combining exercises enable you to experiment with sentence structure, to play with different types of structures within the sentence and to develop smooth expression that flows from beginning to end of a paragraph. Practicing some sentence combining exercises when you don’t feel like writing will start you on your way. When you are revising your own work, note whether combining some sentences will improve your expression.
What is sentence combining? Sentence combining is rewriting kernel sentences in a variety of ways. A kernel sentence reduces a complete sentence to its individual ideas. No combined sentence is either right or wrong. You give yourself choices in expressing your ideas. The test is whether the expression flows from beginning to end of your paragraph.
When I demonstrate a particular activity or piece of usage or sentence structure, I like to use an “idiot sentence” that clearly shows what I am talking about.
Here is a series of “kernel sentences”: “Tom played football. He was the captain of the team. He played tight end.”
Combined: Tom, a football player, was captain of the team and played tight end.
Combined: Tom, who played football at tight end, was the captain of the team.
Combined: Tom was a football player, tight end and captain of the team.
Combined: When Tom played football, he was a tight end and the captain of the team.
Combined: After Tom played tight end for the team, he was elected Captain.
Combined: Tom, a tight end, was elected captain of the football team.
Combined: A tight end, Tom was elected captain of the football team.
Combined: With Tom as their best tight end, the team elected him captain.
Combined: Let me introduce you to Tom: football player, tight end and captain of the team.
And so on and so on.
All kinds of variations are acceptable. No sentence is right or wrong. The question you need to ask yourself as you go over your own writing is whether you can combine your sentences to make them more interesting. Sentence combining practice also helps you to realize that alternative sentence patterns are available to you.
Let’s take another example, this time a sentence by JFK;
Kernel sentence: There are many Americans. They have lost their way. They have lost their will. They have lost their sense of history. They have lost their sense of purpose.
Combined: Many Americans have lost their way, their will, their sense of history and their purpose.
Combined: Having lost their way and will, many Americans no longer have an historic sense of purpose.
Combined: They have lost their way and will, and many Americans no longer have an historic sense of purpose.
Combined: Many Americans have lost their way, have lost their will, have lost their sense of history and have lost their purpose.
Combined: Because many Americans have lost their way and their will, they have also lost their sense of history and purpose.
As I look back over my sentence combining with JFK's statement, I realize I produced some clunkers.
Tomorrow, I will tell you what JFK actually said. Just because an author has chosen a particular sentence pattern is no assurance that it is the best. In this case, however, I think it is.
Summary: Sentence combining enables you to experiment with sentence structure, to play with different types of structures within the sentence and to develop smooth expression that flows from beginning to end of a paragraph. Practicing some sentence combining exercises when you don’t feel like writing will start you on your way. When revising and editing your own writing, check to see if you can combine some sentences to produce a smoother style of writing.
All the best. RayS.
Answer: Practice in sentence combining can improve style and flow of expression. Sentence combining exercises enable you to experiment with sentence structure, to play with different types of structures within the sentence and to develop smooth expression that flows from beginning to end of a paragraph. Practicing some sentence combining exercises when you don’t feel like writing will start you on your way. When you are revising your own work, note whether combining some sentences will improve your expression.
What is sentence combining? Sentence combining is rewriting kernel sentences in a variety of ways. A kernel sentence reduces a complete sentence to its individual ideas. No combined sentence is either right or wrong. You give yourself choices in expressing your ideas. The test is whether the expression flows from beginning to end of your paragraph.
When I demonstrate a particular activity or piece of usage or sentence structure, I like to use an “idiot sentence” that clearly shows what I am talking about.
Here is a series of “kernel sentences”: “Tom played football. He was the captain of the team. He played tight end.”
Combined: Tom, a football player, was captain of the team and played tight end.
Combined: Tom, who played football at tight end, was the captain of the team.
Combined: Tom was a football player, tight end and captain of the team.
Combined: When Tom played football, he was a tight end and the captain of the team.
Combined: After Tom played tight end for the team, he was elected Captain.
Combined: Tom, a tight end, was elected captain of the football team.
Combined: A tight end, Tom was elected captain of the football team.
Combined: With Tom as their best tight end, the team elected him captain.
Combined: Let me introduce you to Tom: football player, tight end and captain of the team.
And so on and so on.
All kinds of variations are acceptable. No sentence is right or wrong. The question you need to ask yourself as you go over your own writing is whether you can combine your sentences to make them more interesting. Sentence combining practice also helps you to realize that alternative sentence patterns are available to you.
Let’s take another example, this time a sentence by JFK;
Kernel sentence: There are many Americans. They have lost their way. They have lost their will. They have lost their sense of history. They have lost their sense of purpose.
Combined: Many Americans have lost their way, their will, their sense of history and their purpose.
Combined: Having lost their way and will, many Americans no longer have an historic sense of purpose.
Combined: They have lost their way and will, and many Americans no longer have an historic sense of purpose.
Combined: Many Americans have lost their way, have lost their will, have lost their sense of history and have lost their purpose.
Combined: Because many Americans have lost their way and their will, they have also lost their sense of history and purpose.
As I look back over my sentence combining with JFK's statement, I realize I produced some clunkers.
Tomorrow, I will tell you what JFK actually said. Just because an author has chosen a particular sentence pattern is no assurance that it is the best. In this case, however, I think it is.
Summary: Sentence combining enables you to experiment with sentence structure, to play with different types of structures within the sentence and to develop smooth expression that flows from beginning to end of a paragraph. Practicing some sentence combining exercises when you don’t feel like writing will start you on your way. When revising and editing your own writing, check to see if you can combine some sentences to produce a smoother style of writing.
All the best. RayS.
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Usage: Words Often Confused. U. W.
Question: How can I clarify words that are frequently confused?
Answer: Buy a manual of style and usage. The best I have found is The New York Times Manual of Style and Usage, Times Books, 1990. In the meantime, I will conclude my summary of words most often confused with words beginning “U” and “W,” and I will end with the granddaddy of them all, “who” and “whom.”
With each item, I attach a “Scale of Distraction,” a measure of how many readers are likely to be distracted by the mistakes.
* Who cares.
** Some people you respect will be distracted by the mistake.
*** Many educated people will be distracted by the mistake.
“Unique”: has no equal; unparalleled. Don’t modify with “very,” “rather” or “almost.” (**)
“Unprecedented”: for the first time. Don’t modify with “very,” “rather,” or “almost.” (**)
“Worshiped,” “worshiper,” “worshiping.” Accent falls on the first syllable—“wor’shiped,” “wor’shiper” and “wor’shiping.” Therefore, you don’t double the “p.” Doesn’t look right though. I might try to write around it. (*)
On the other hand:
“Programmed,” “programmer,” “programming.” Depending on how you pronounce these words, the accent falls on the second syllable: “program’med,” “program’mer,” “program’ming.” Therefore the “m” is doubled. (*)
I know! you pronounce it “pro’gramed.” Well I guess most people don’t pronounce it with the accent on the first syllable. But enough who do confuse the issue: I have seen “programed,” “programer” and “programing.” Such is English.
And now—Ta da!—the granddaddy of all issues in English usage: “who” and “whom.”
“Who” is the same as “he,” “she,” and “they.” “Whom” is the same as “him” “her” or “them.”
The biggest problem with “who” and “whom” (and “whoever” and “whomever”) is subordinate clauses: “Anybody who orders now will receive a free gift.” “…who orders now” is a subordinate clause.
The amount of grammar I would have to teach to clarify the differences between “who” and “whom” and “whoever” and “whomever” would take several pages at least and, if you were in class, several class periods. You would have to know the subject (“who has…”) and predicate nominative (“…was who”) of a sentence. You would have to know the direct object (“...should remember whom”), “indirect object” (“…give whom a gift”) and object of the preposition (“…to whom”) in a sentence. If you already know all that, you will probably be able to figure out which to use.
All that grammar just to distinguish between “who” and “whom” does not seem worth the effort. [My humble apologies, Mrs. May.] A pretty strong move is already afoot to eliminate “whom” and “whomever” entirely anyway. The distinction between "who" and "whom" will disappear even before “lie” and “lay.”
If you don’t know all that grammar, write or speak around it.
Example: “The character whom the people hate in An Enemy of the People is Dr. Stockman.” Write around it: “The character the people hate in An Enemy of the People is Dr. Stockman.”
Example: “The son who closely resembles Willy Loman in Death of a Salesman is Happy.” Write around it: “The son most resembling Willy Loman in Death of a Salesman is Happy.”
Somehow, I am able to distinguish “who” and “whom” in subjects, predicate nominatives, direct objects, indirect objects and objects of prepositions. But it requires some thinking and figuring. You’re better off speaking and writing around “who,” “whom,” “whoever” and “whomever” if you are not certain which to use. Choosing the wrong one can make you look pompous and maybe foolish. (**)
Note: I took the preceding examples from English Grammar and Composition. Complete Course. Liberty Edition. John E. Warriner. Harcourt Brace Jovanovich Publishers. 1986.
All the best. RayS.
Answer: Buy a manual of style and usage. The best I have found is The New York Times Manual of Style and Usage, Times Books, 1990. In the meantime, I will conclude my summary of words most often confused with words beginning “U” and “W,” and I will end with the granddaddy of them all, “who” and “whom.”
With each item, I attach a “Scale of Distraction,” a measure of how many readers are likely to be distracted by the mistakes.
* Who cares.
** Some people you respect will be distracted by the mistake.
*** Many educated people will be distracted by the mistake.
“Unique”: has no equal; unparalleled. Don’t modify with “very,” “rather” or “almost.” (**)
“Unprecedented”: for the first time. Don’t modify with “very,” “rather,” or “almost.” (**)
“Worshiped,” “worshiper,” “worshiping.” Accent falls on the first syllable—“wor’shiped,” “wor’shiper” and “wor’shiping.” Therefore, you don’t double the “p.” Doesn’t look right though. I might try to write around it. (*)
On the other hand:
“Programmed,” “programmer,” “programming.” Depending on how you pronounce these words, the accent falls on the second syllable: “program’med,” “program’mer,” “program’ming.” Therefore the “m” is doubled. (*)
I know! you pronounce it “pro’gramed.” Well I guess most people don’t pronounce it with the accent on the first syllable. But enough who do confuse the issue: I have seen “programed,” “programer” and “programing.” Such is English.
And now—Ta da!—the granddaddy of all issues in English usage: “who” and “whom.”
“Who” is the same as “he,” “she,” and “they.” “Whom” is the same as “him” “her” or “them.”
The biggest problem with “who” and “whom” (and “whoever” and “whomever”) is subordinate clauses: “Anybody who orders now will receive a free gift.” “…who orders now” is a subordinate clause.
The amount of grammar I would have to teach to clarify the differences between “who” and “whom” and “whoever” and “whomever” would take several pages at least and, if you were in class, several class periods. You would have to know the subject (“who has…”) and predicate nominative (“…was who”) of a sentence. You would have to know the direct object (“...should remember whom”), “indirect object” (“…give whom a gift”) and object of the preposition (“…to whom”) in a sentence. If you already know all that, you will probably be able to figure out which to use.
All that grammar just to distinguish between “who” and “whom” does not seem worth the effort. [My humble apologies, Mrs. May.] A pretty strong move is already afoot to eliminate “whom” and “whomever” entirely anyway. The distinction between "who" and "whom" will disappear even before “lie” and “lay.”
If you don’t know all that grammar, write or speak around it.
Example: “The character whom the people hate in An Enemy of the People is Dr. Stockman.” Write around it: “The character the people hate in An Enemy of the People is Dr. Stockman.”
Example: “The son who closely resembles Willy Loman in Death of a Salesman is Happy.” Write around it: “The son most resembling Willy Loman in Death of a Salesman is Happy.”
Somehow, I am able to distinguish “who” and “whom” in subjects, predicate nominatives, direct objects, indirect objects and objects of prepositions. But it requires some thinking and figuring. You’re better off speaking and writing around “who,” “whom,” “whoever” and “whomever” if you are not certain which to use. Choosing the wrong one can make you look pompous and maybe foolish. (**)
Note: I took the preceding examples from English Grammar and Composition. Complete Course. Liberty Edition. John E. Warriner. Harcourt Brace Jovanovich Publishers. 1986.
All the best. RayS.
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Usage: Words Often Confused. T.
Question: How can I clarify words that are frequently confused?
Answer: In this issue of “Q & A on Writing,” I clarify the meanings of frequently confused words beginning with the letter “T.” Plural of “tablespoonful and teaspoonful”; that/which; that/who; their, theirs, them, they; tortuous/torturous; traveled, traveler, traveling; toward/towards; turbid/turgid.
Tablespoonfuls; teaspoonfuls. (**)
That/which. Another tricky item of usage to explain. An example might be the best explanation. “The drivers of all cars that go over 55 mph will arrested.” No commas separate “that go over 55 mph” because not “all drivers” will be arrested, but only “drivers of all cars that go over 55 mph.” (***)
On the other hand, “The drivers of all cars that go over 55 mph, which we believe to be an unsafe speed, will be arrested.” Commas surround “which we believe to be an unsafe speed” because the phrase is an added comment that interrupts the main sentence. (**)
That/who. “Who” is for people. “That” is for objects. "Who" for people sounds better, although some style manuals accept both “that” and “who” for people. (**)
Their, theirs, them, they are plural. Don’t use with singular subject: “Everyone returned to their homes.” “Everyone” is singular. “Their” is plural. “His” would be singular and traditionally correct, but is considered to be “sexist,” meaning that “his” refers to the world as all male. To avoid “their” in this example, or the awkward “his or her,” begin with the plural and stay with it throughout the sentence: “The partygoers returned to their homes.” You will be surprised at how smoothly your sentences will flow if you begin with the plural. (**)
Tortuous = twisting, turning, tangled; torturous = anguished. (**)
Toward, not towards. (*)
Traveled, traveler, traveling. We live in America, not in Great Britain or Canada. In America, if the accent is on the first syllable, the final “l” is not doubled. (**)
Turbid = muddy; turgid = swollen. (**)
All the best. RayS.
Answer: In this issue of “Q & A on Writing,” I clarify the meanings of frequently confused words beginning with the letter “T.” Plural of “tablespoonful and teaspoonful”; that/which; that/who; their, theirs, them, they; tortuous/torturous; traveled, traveler, traveling; toward/towards; turbid/turgid.
Tablespoonfuls; teaspoonfuls. (**)
That/which. Another tricky item of usage to explain. An example might be the best explanation. “The drivers of all cars that go over 55 mph will arrested.” No commas separate “that go over 55 mph” because not “all drivers” will be arrested, but only “drivers of all cars that go over 55 mph.” (***)
On the other hand, “The drivers of all cars that go over 55 mph, which we believe to be an unsafe speed, will be arrested.” Commas surround “which we believe to be an unsafe speed” because the phrase is an added comment that interrupts the main sentence. (**)
That/who. “Who” is for people. “That” is for objects. "Who" for people sounds better, although some style manuals accept both “that” and “who” for people. (**)
Their, theirs, them, they are plural. Don’t use with singular subject: “Everyone returned to their homes.” “Everyone” is singular. “Their” is plural. “His” would be singular and traditionally correct, but is considered to be “sexist,” meaning that “his” refers to the world as all male. To avoid “their” in this example, or the awkward “his or her,” begin with the plural and stay with it throughout the sentence: “The partygoers returned to their homes.” You will be surprised at how smoothly your sentences will flow if you begin with the plural. (**)
Tortuous = twisting, turning, tangled; torturous = anguished. (**)
Toward, not towards. (*)
Traveled, traveler, traveling. We live in America, not in Great Britain or Canada. In America, if the accent is on the first syllable, the final “l” is not doubled. (**)
Turbid = muddy; turgid = swollen. (**)
All the best. RayS.
Monday, July 2, 2007
Usage: Words often Confused. S.
Question: How can I clarify words that are frequently confused?
Answer: In this issue of "Q & A on Writing," I clarify the meanings of confusing words beginning with "s": sacrilegious; shine/shined/shone; split infinitive; stanch/staunch; subjunctive; supine/prone. Today's session contains two particularly tricky pieces of usage: the split infinitive and the subjunctive. Difficult to explain, that is.
"Sacrilegious": Does not contain the word "religious." Again, I use Harry Shefter's Six Minutes a Day to Perfect Spelling: "You RILE me with your sacRILEgious ideas." (***)
Shine, shined, shone: Use "shined" with a direct object: "He shined the flashlight on the house." "Flashlight" is the direct object of "shined." Shined what? "Flashlight." Without the object, use "shone": "The sun shone only once this week." Thanks to the NYT Manual of Style and Usage. I didn't know that! RayS. (*)
Split infinitive. "To" with a verb is called an infinitive: "to run," etc. To put a word between the "to" and the verb is called a "split infinitive," cursed by many a grammar purist: "to better prepare...." If the split infinitive sounds smooth, use it. Don't make an awkward construction in order to un-split the infinitive. When in doubt, write around it: "I can improve my preparation by...." A matter of judgment. (**)
Stanch = stop the flow (usually of blood); staunch = firm and resolute. (***)
The subjunctive means "contrary to fact." "I wish I were...." "As if he were...." "I wish..." and "As if..." are almost always followed by "were." The problem is with "If." If "if" means contrary to fact, use "were": "If he were here, we'd know the answer." If "if" is a statement of fact, use the singular past tense, "was." "He asked if she was going on vacation this month." If you're not sure, write around it: "I wish I could go with you" instead of "I wish I were going with you." You'll have to use some fast thinking, if you're using the subjunctive when speaking. (***)
"Supine" means lying on the ground face up; "prone" means lying on the ground face down. Once again, thanks to the NYT Manual of Style and Usage. I did not know the distinction existed. I do remember that in the army, "Assume the prone position" meant "Hit the dirt with your rifle ready to fire." (*)
All the best. RayS.
Answer: In this issue of "Q & A on Writing," I clarify the meanings of confusing words beginning with "s": sacrilegious; shine/shined/shone; split infinitive; stanch/staunch; subjunctive; supine/prone. Today's session contains two particularly tricky pieces of usage: the split infinitive and the subjunctive. Difficult to explain, that is.
"Sacrilegious": Does not contain the word "religious." Again, I use Harry Shefter's Six Minutes a Day to Perfect Spelling: "You RILE me with your sacRILEgious ideas." (***)
Shine, shined, shone: Use "shined" with a direct object: "He shined the flashlight on the house." "Flashlight" is the direct object of "shined." Shined what? "Flashlight." Without the object, use "shone": "The sun shone only once this week." Thanks to the NYT Manual of Style and Usage. I didn't know that! RayS. (*)
Split infinitive. "To" with a verb is called an infinitive: "to run," etc. To put a word between the "to" and the verb is called a "split infinitive," cursed by many a grammar purist: "to better prepare...." If the split infinitive sounds smooth, use it. Don't make an awkward construction in order to un-split the infinitive. When in doubt, write around it: "I can improve my preparation by...." A matter of judgment. (**)
Stanch = stop the flow (usually of blood); staunch = firm and resolute. (***)
The subjunctive means "contrary to fact." "I wish I were...." "As if he were...." "I wish..." and "As if..." are almost always followed by "were." The problem is with "If." If "if" means contrary to fact, use "were": "If he were here, we'd know the answer." If "if" is a statement of fact, use the singular past tense, "was." "He asked if she was going on vacation this month." If you're not sure, write around it: "I wish I could go with you" instead of "I wish I were going with you." You'll have to use some fast thinking, if you're using the subjunctive when speaking. (***)
"Supine" means lying on the ground face up; "prone" means lying on the ground face down. Once again, thanks to the NYT Manual of Style and Usage. I did not know the distinction existed. I do remember that in the army, "Assume the prone position" meant "Hit the dirt with your rifle ready to fire." (*)
All the best. RayS.
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